novel 83 - 12. al's and bud's

by nick nelson

part twelve of ?

to read previous chapter, click here

to begin at the beginning, click here

what do you think so far? uh- kind of heavy handed, but all right, i guess * albert was a. creature of habit, and grew more so as he grew older. almost every day at noon he took himself to al’s coffee shop. and almost every day ordered the same thing. a medium decaf and a raspberry danish - sometimes a cheese danish. despite following this routine fro years, none of the employees at al’s ever seemed to notice him or to comment on his punctual appearances. one reason might have been the high turnover of the employees - about 34 percent higher than that of other similar establishments. when albert first began frequenting as he thought some persons - preferably women - might occasionally ask if they could sit at the same table with him. but al’s was not that busy a place, and in all the years albert frequented it, nobody ever dd. sometimes albert wondered what he would do if al’s went out of business - he thought finding a like place in the ever changing world of the no longer so new new century might not be easy. but he would put the thought out of his mind and go back to his dreams. and then finally the inevitable happened - al’s went out of business - overnight and with no warning. like, albert thought, the collapse of the soviet union back in - whenever it was. albert went on line and googled “old fashioned coffee shops near me”. he immediately found a place called bud’s only two blocks away. ' bud’s seemed a replica of al’s except that it was slightly smaller and its front faced north instead of south. albert wondered if this would make a difference when winter came and the winds starting blowing. on alberts first day at bud’s the middle aged woman behind the counter asked him his name! no one had ever done so in all the years at al’s. did this mean the world was getting friendlier? if it did, it meant everything albert had read and been told fr decades was wrong. in any case, albert told her his name. and she told albert hers - elsa flowers. what next? albert wondered, as he sipped his cup of decaf , which seemed a little stronger than al’s had been. will somebdy ask if they sit down across from me? and sure enough, only two days later, somebody did. and he met charles dunwoody. mind if i sit here? charles asked. of course not, albert replied, as if t were the most natural thing in the world. to be continued

novel 83 - 11. reset

by nick nelson

part eleven of ?

to read previous chapter, click here

to begin at the beginning, click here

it all began on an overcast afternoon on victor widespan’s yacht. it had been warm and muggy all day, with no sign of a hurricane or a revolution or anything very exciting. koji lightyear asked if anybody wanted to play shuffleboard and nobody as interested. gena harris proposed playing charades and nobody said anu=ything. excuse me. yes? who are these people, exactly, and why am i supposed to be interested in them? well, before they were characters in this novel you - you. with assistance from a i., are writing, they were lonely people just like you. they do not sound like lonely people, they sound like a bunch of jerks. just because people are jerks, or belong to a bunch of jerks, does not mean they might be lonely . if you say so. by the way, does this mean that i, as a lonely person, might end up in somebody else’s novel? maybe. .but only if you sign a waiver allowing us to. but i do not have to sign the waiver? no, of course not. shall i - we continue? what were these people like before they were a bunch of entitled jerks drinking dom perignon on victor widespans’s yacht.? would you like to start over? please. most people like stories about people on yachts, but if you want something a bit more proletarian, we are happy to oblige. i am more of a power to the people person, so let’s do it. whom shall we start with? i don’t care. start in alphabetical order. i am an alphabetical order person. like a lot of lonely people. if you say so. * albert brown wanted two things - to be a great writer and to get a girl. he did not have any luck in either endeavor, and as the years went by his chances grew dimmer. besides his own rapid aging, the world changed in ways that even further reduced his chances . fiction and poetry continued to be published, but not the type of fiction and poetry albert had known as a dreaming adolescent and young man. there were no more stendhals or hemingways or t s eliots or audens, and there was no audience or expectation for new stendhals or hemingways or t s eliots or audens. there were only, it seemed to albert, identiity politics, identity politics, identity politicss and romance novels. as for getting a girl, the picture was even bleaker. at the time our story commences, according to wikipedia, there were only about 20,000 “heteronormative” human females on the planet seeking live human males as mates.. and these rare creatures would not glance at any man worth less than a billion dollars - preferably 10 or 20 billion. sometime albert felt so sad he could sit down and cry. at other times he felt curious surges of confidence, and felt that everything would turn out right in the end. next

novel 83 - 10. the fireplace

by nick nelson

part ten of ?

to read previous chapter, click here

to begin at the beginning, click here

it was getting cold in the old house beside the abandoned highway. ima joker, seated in the enormous stuffed armchair in the middle of the room, stared at the cold dark fireplace. we should build a fire, he announced for the third time . with what? meiinda nightingale asked acerbicly. do you know how? sally turk aded. ima glanced at quintessential robinson as if for help, but quintessential, seated on the floor below the cracked window, ignored him. good question, ima replied wearily to sally. they lapsed into silence. outside, a dog barked. it did not sound like a very big dog. i wish that was a wolf and it howled, ima said. why? sally asked. it would make things a little more dramatic. nobody responded. after a while, quintessential got up, stretched, and went out the front door. where is he going? melinda asked. nobody answered. is he coming back? sally asked. you ask too many questions , ima pronounced. meliinda looked over at sally. sally and melinda wondered if ima was going t o get up and follow quintessential. but he made no move to do so. he continued to stare at the cold fireplace. the minutes crawled by. quintessential did not return. finally they heard a car coming down the highway. that had better be koji, ima announced. melinda laughed. what if it is not? sally asked. next

novel 83 - 9. new assignment

by nick nelson

part nine of ?

to read previous chapter, click here

to begin at the beginning, click here

suddenly omar’s phone rang. simultaneously gena’s phone rang. gena stopped looking for her keys. omar stopped watching gena looking for her keys. stop what you are doing - you have a new assignment. gena looked around the parking lot . omar had gotten out of the dodge el dorado and waved to gena, go ahead, the voice on her phone told gena. gena went over to the dodge el dorado and got in the front passenger seat. omar got back in the operator seat. it all happened in a matter of seconds. charles dunwoody had been watching the whole scenario from his seat at the window of the bar . charles turned on his phone. it was in text mode. behind the bar, elsa flowers stopped talking to herself and warched charles out of the corner of her hawk eye. proceed to the junction of highway 73 and south river road . junction - you do not hear that word much any more, gena observed conversationally. omar ignored her and started the dodge el dorado. they left the parking lot and headed down the highway.. were they looking for adventure? excuse me? were omar and gena looking for adventure? i am glad to see you are paying attention. but, no, they were following instructions, as i am. koji lightyear continued down highway 91 in his blue ford f-150. his phone rang. next

novel 83 - 8. what about

by nick nelson

part eight of ?

to read previous chapter, click here

to begin at the beginning, click here

thank you. wait, i have some questions. what about albert brown? what about charles dunwoody? what about elsa flowers? what about ima joker? what about them? you have not mentioned them yet. all in good time, soames, all in good time. so you will get to them? and by the way, my name is not soames. sorry, i must have been thinking of one of the seventeen people i interviewed earlier this morning - or all of them. i grudgingly accept your abject apology. now, back to albert brown and company. i told ypu, all in good time. the time is now. you are very persistent. that is just the way i am. maybe that is why you are lonely. who said i was lonely? is that not why you are here? yes, now that you mention it, i guess it is. you are lonely, and you are exploring the concept of loneliness by writing a novel under my watchful eye with the help of a i. that is a lot of words so it must be true. are you lonely tonight? about the same as usual. let us return tp omar and gena in the parking lot pf the hotel superbe. next

novel 83 - 7. sunset

by nick nelson

part seven of ?

to read previous chapter, click here

to begin at the beginning, click here

ursula vanderleffer and willoughby xenophon-st john met for cocktails at sunset on victor widespan’s private beach. the sun was going down in a magnificent red and gold chiaroscuric conflagration over the purpling waters. ursula’s petite raven - haired handmaid was spreading ursula’a fabulously costly hand-woven beach towel over the sparkling sands. willoughby xenophon-st john waited in the wings, making no attempt to conceal his rapidly growing impatience. how do you like it so far? it’s great. shall i continue? go for it. back at the hotel bar, gena harris and koji lightyear were putting their heads together. are we all set? yes. good. without looking at his watch or phone, koji waited exactly fifteen minutes. he got up and left without saying another word to gena, gena took another four minutes and nineteen seconds to finish her margarita. then she too got up and left. night had fallen fast, as it did in the tropics. omar plunkett watched from his dodge el dorado as gena approached her lexus at a leisurely pace. come on, lady, get a move on. when gena finally reached the lexus, she dropped her key on the pavement. the clock was ticking. omar cursed like a chief financial officer at a board meeting, which he had been in several of his previous lives. gena could not find her key! how are we doing? keep it rolling. next

novel 83 - 6. different

by nick nelson

part six of ?

to read previous chapter, click here

to begin at the beginning, click here

people are lonely for different reasons . some people are lonely because nobody likes them. other people are lonely because they do not like anybody. here are ten examples of people who are lonely because nobody likes them. a). albert brown because he thought he knew everything, b). charles dunwoody because he was always sneaking around c). elsa flowers because she was always talking to herself. d). gena harris because she was ignorant. e). ima joker because he thought he was funny but he was not. f). koji lightyear because he was fat. g). melinda nightingale because she was a snitch. h). omar plunkett because he was always arguing. t). quintessential robinson beause he never looked anybody in the eye. j) sally turk because she wore too much perfume. ok, that’s ten people who are lonely because nobody likes them. now what? write a novel about them. wrte a novel? how much time do i have? half an hour. can i use a i? of course, how else are you going to write one? can i have a cup of coffee first? you can have all the coffee you want while a i writes the book. next